Perfect Parts
Two weekends ago, my husband baked banana bread. Last weekend, he made blueberry muffins. He’s preparing himself for the quintessential autumn dessert – pumpkin pie! We cut it into eight perfect slices and put a squirt of homemade whipped cream on the top. Yummmm!
Our Pie Parts
Eight perfect slices. Would that our parts had been created with perfect precision! Some of them take an oversized role in our inner landscapes and others appear only occasionally when the situation merits it. Some stand guard to make sure no one enters our inner domain without having passed inspection and some slide in and out when we least expect them. Some cause havoc and some are good little boys or girls. Would you believe that some actually think they’re “us!” The pieces of our pumpkin pie are all shapes and sizes to represent our complicated selves and the complicated histories we’ve lived.
Accept Our Parts
I know some of us struggle with accepting the fact we have parts. We may pretend they aren’t there, resist getting to know them, and try to block them by ignoring them or overcompensating to drown them out. It won’t last long. They are a part of us, and we can’t get rid of them. Like all small children, they’ll continue to make noise until we pay attention.
Love and Respect Our Parts
Each of our parts deserves the same love and respect that every other part receives, the love and respect they didn’t get when they were little, and the love and respect we often think we don’t deserve.
Our parts may not make up a perfectly symmetrical pumpkin pie, but they make up a perfect “us.” We come in many different colors, shapes, sizes, temperaments, goals, and dreams that are personified in our uniquely creative parts. Although they each take on different roles in our inner and outer worlds, each is an integral ingredient in our pie – and each deserves an equal piece of the pie, with a little bit of homemade whipped cream on top!
Self-Care
If you are hoping to “integrate” your parts, remember, you can only integrate your memories, your feelings, and your sense of self. As you love and respect your parts, you integrate who they are into who you think you are. This brings forth a beautiful sense of wholeness. Out of that integration, your parts will decide if they want to remain separate or go the next step to fusion. Yes, you are creative. Yes, you are angry. Yes, you are happy. Yes, you are sad. Yes, you are driven. Yes, you are sexual. Yes, you are asexual. Yes, you are cautious. Yes, you are adventureous. Yes, you are all of these and more because you are a complete human being, as one or as many.
Enjoy the pie!
Invitation
Check out my website at www.lynbarrett.com where you can download my free ebook called DID Unpacked and receive a free weekly newsletter. My memoir, Crazy: Reclaiming Life from the Shadow of Traumatic Memory will be released on January 3, 2022. PREORDERS are available NOW on Amazon and Barnes and Noble online. Check out our Tote Bag Special for the first 50 preorders! Our new Dissociative Writers website is filled with writing opportunities to explore.
What Do You Say?
Share your thoughts in the Comments below.
How different are your parts from each other? How do they make up the pie?
Do you accept them and give them an equal part of your pie?
Or do you try to pretend they’re not there?
🕊
I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.
Pslam 139: 14